This morning there was a lot of chaos under this roof. There is always some chaos, but today there was an above average amount.
It was a no dress code day for my three grade schoolers, though my husband dressed them all in uniforms. When I came down the steps, they were crying and gnashing their teeth, and pleading with me to help.
I didn't know it was a no dress code day, my husband responded to the question, why are they in their uniforms?
The bus will be here any minute. There is no time for them to change.
I'll change them and take them to school today.
Do you really want to? he asks.
The teenager is not ready. She doesn't feel good and her pants are too long. Consequently, she is not ready to leave with her father.
Do you want to take her to school too?
On the way to school, she is crying, I'm going to be late, while Ethan speaks up from the back seat...
I forgot my library book, again. I promised I would bring it back today. I have to go home and get it.
We arrive at high school.
I'll call you when I'm done.
Oh, except I forgot my phone.
You don't mind if I take yours, do you?
We drop the little kids off in the car line and the vice principal wants to know why Ethan is getting out of the car?
Aren't you coming to school today she asks?
The library book story is recounted.
She assures him he can bring it on Monday, but he won't get out of the car.
My mom is going to take me home to get it.
She looks at me and asks, do you really want to?
As we make our second trip back to school, I contemplate all the times I have been asked the question DO I REALLY WANT TO? in the relatively short amount of time since I have been conscious. Each time, it was asked, I didn't really answer. I took it as more of hypothetical, thinking each time, do I really have choice?
When Ethan got out of the car, book in hand, obviously relieved that he wasn't going to have to avoid the librarian all day as his older sister suggested, I realized that the question wasn't a hypothetical. I could have let them go to school in their uniforms; could have made my husband drive daughter to school and get to work late; could have insisted that Ethan get out of the car the first time I drove school...
So I guess the answer is yes, I really do want to. Not that I enjoy necessarily driving around like a limo driver, picking up others slack, surrendering my cell phone at moments notice...it's not about the particulars. What I really want to do is help my family, and if something as simple second trip back home to get a forgotten book can make my son's day better, then yes, I really want to. If only all the worlds problems could be solved so easily.